I felt this restlessness and void from the lack of traveling to go see home or family members. For the past four years I’ve always traveled somewhere to go see family members I can’t normally see. Whether it was the Philippines or California, the trips always satiated my desire to see people who are important to me. I think the biggest devastation that I have felt because of this virus is the fact that I wasn’t able to travel. For the past year my father and I have been discussing a chance for my sister and I to either see him in California or go back home to the Philippines to see my grandma during spring break. We dreamed about plans of walking on the beach and seeing palm trees towering above gumamela flowers. In the horizon you can see “balay balay” and Filipino boats floating gently above vibrant coral forests. Just as we were trying to finalize plans and make our dreams into reality Covid-19 hit us. I could see the vast ocean slowly fade into the dark brown flooring of my room and the wide open landscape shrink to the confinement’s of my room. We are stuck. My dad is trapped in California for the next three months, working the front line defense against Corona, ICU ward in a hospital. He will miss my birthday and I will miss dreaming with him for the meantime.
The restlessness of my family’s company has not abandoned my body, unlike my hopes. Staring at the ukulele in the corner of my room I picked up three Bottles of acrylic kids paint and two paintbrushes and got to work. The world my father and I discussed slowly appeared on the body of the ukulele and all my anxiety and restlessness left mine. Although this wasn’t a ticket to the arms of my loved ones, it gave me cement to fill this void I felt. Time of distress and distraction I’m glad that there are such things as creation and joy.
I also am unable to see my family and friends in Poland which makes us on both sides extremely sad. My cousins and I made lots of plans to make the most of our time together like visiting our grandparents (which I would have still done regardless if I was there). My mom, who is also a healthcare worker, isn't able to go back home either because of this. Due to her work schedule, it's very difficult for her to schedule a long enough vacation time during the summer and this summer was the year she was supposed to come with my sister and I to see our family. I hope this will be all over soon so we can go visit our families.
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